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The best lifestyle- Living with Compassion2013-10-24

 

 Dharma Talk by the CTTB Abbot Dharma Master Heng Lyu
 

I will start by telling a story, which happened when the Buddha dwelt in the Garden of Anathapindada, the benefactor of orphans and the solitary, the Jeta Grove in Shravasti, King Prasenajit and his wife Madame Jasmine were having a discussion, and King Prasenajit asked Madame Jasmine, "Who do you think is the most important person to you?"

Everyone knows that in the ancient era of centralized monarchy, whoever ventured to claim that the king was not the most important person, would be executed. Additionally, King Prasenajit was a very cruel person with very bad temper before he learned from the Buddha. But Madame Jasmine had a very direct mind, she told the king, “Your majesty, I think for me, no one else is more important than myself.” She did not say: “You are the most important person in the world.” She did not flatter him. After hearing this, the king frankly said, “I think you are right.”

Madame Jasmine then asked the king, “Do you think there is anyone else who is more important to you than yourself?” The king said, “How could that be possible? I am the one and only!” They felt they had a good answer, so they went to ask the Buddha. How did the Buddha respond?

Someone just mentioned, “I think my parents and kids are the most important.” I believe some people think, “I am willing to sacrifice my life for my parents and my kids”, and I believe many people can do so. However it also proves that our will, for us, is the most important to us, not the will of others. In other words, things which we are willing to do are actually done for us, since they are my will and my wish, not those of others.

So when the Buddha heard their discussion, he agreed with them. The Buddha said, “In this world, if you search throughout all directions up to the heavens and down to the earth, you will find no one who is more important than yourself.” The Buddha then added, “Since all living beings treasure themselves so much and think that they themselves are the most important, we should have empathy, putting ourselves in others’ shoes. We should not hurt others.”

This is to say, if I do not want people to kill or beat me, I should not kill or beat others; if I do not want others to steal my stuff, I should not steal from others; If I do not want others to break up my marriage, then I should not undermine others’ marriage; If I do not want others to deceive me, sow dissension toward me, or scold me, then I should not scold others, foment dissension, or deceive others; I do not want people who are drunk or on drugs to disturb me, or I do not want to be exposed to second-hand smoke, so I should not smoke, drink or do drugs.

Sounds familiar? These are the precepts we refer to, right? So we learn that precepts are an expression of empathy. In other words, empathy is the basis of compassion. Therefore, the Venerable Master told us only one fundamental precept. What is that? It is to not be selfish. The fourth one of the six guidelines of CTTB is to not be selfish, which means we should follow the precepts and be compassionate.

The English word empathy is very interesting. The old Chinese saying “All human shares the same mind and the mind share the same principle.” refers to empathy. The structure of word empathy is composed of two parts, one is em and the other is pathy. The origin of em is in, and pathy is path. In other words, I walk on the same path with living beings; I can feel how they feel, because we walk together and I understand their situations.

Let us talk about compassion, since compassion will bring light and inspire hope in our hearts, and make us feel warm and positive. If our inner compassion is inactivated, we will feel separated from what is true, wholesome and beautiful in our life. Thus, our inner self will fall into a cold, dark and disappointed state.

Actually let us examine carefully and observe our body and mind. We will find that in each and every thought, we are in the samsara of cause and effect. With one thought of compassion, we will feel very light physically and mentally, in a very hearty spirit. Conversely, whenever we give rise to a thought of ignorant anger, we will feel dark inside while our body and mind are very heavy. So in each and every thought, we are experiencing the karma we created, and obtaining good or bad retribution is contingent on one thought.

Helen Wu is one of the Venerable Master’s senior disciples. Yesterday, her husband Doctor Wu’s memorial ceremony was held in LA. He died at the age 86. The Venerable Master mentioned that he was a Bodhisattva. Why? Because Doctor Wu is very compassionate, it is very natural for him to help others, and he treated the poor patients for free. Doctor Wu said he was very happy every day, because he was able to help others. Although he is not a Buddhist, he does things this way, which comes from his inherent-nature. On the day he passed away, he saw three patients before he died. That is why the Venerable Master said that he was a Bodhisattva.

Some of you may say, “I am not a doctor, and I am not even a nurse.” However, we still can lend a helping hand to living beings. We may ask them: “Anything I can do to help?” Whoever hears this will surely feel warm and happy because of our willingness to help them. If they accept our well-intentioned help, and their request is what we are willing to do and is within our capacity, we should really do it, to sincerely help them. Because the very best way of life is living with a heart full of compassion, it is the happiest lifestyle, the lifestyle that benefits in hundreds and thousands of ways, but never harms.

Some of you will ask, “Dharma Master, what about if their request is not a small matter, but a big favor out of my capacity? How should I do? Or what if it is something I am not willing to do?” Then we can politely reject. At least we let them know, we are sincerely willing to help them. Then they will also feel happy and grateful, at the same time, they can understand why we are unable to help them.